Podcast Summary
In Episode 12 of the 52 Life Lessons series, Tim Borys explores a truth most of us intellectually accept but emotionally resist: change is constant and resisting it quietly drains our energy, clarity, and potential.
Through personal stories, neuroscience research, and powerful reflections, Tim unpacks how the brain interprets uncertainty as threat even when no real danger exists. He shares a pivotal mastermind moment that shifted his perspective on disruption and how reframing change from threat to opportunity transformed both his business and personal growth.
Tim also opens up about a deeply challenging season of life where the lesson felt impossible to apply reminding listeners that growth is rarely linear and often painful before it becomes powerful.
Anchored by insights from Ellen Langer, Peter Senge, James Belasco, Ralph Stayer, and Robin Sharma, this episode is a practical and emotional guide to meeting change with courage rather than resistance.
If you are navigating uncertainty professionally or personally this lesson is both grounding and empowering.
✅ Key Takeaways
The brain treats uncertainty as threat. The amygdala activates even when no real danger exists.
- Resistance drains energy. Arguing with reality steals mental bandwidth.
Mindset determines outcome. Growth-oriented thinking increases resilience and adaptability.
Disruption often hides opportunity. Many breakthroughs begin as frustration.
Support accelerates healing. Coaches, friends, and reflection create perspective.
Change is inevitable, growth is optional. How we respond determines the result.
Episode Links & Resources
Resources Mentioned:
Connect with Tim: https://timborys.com/book-tim/
Buy Tim’s Book: The Fitness Curveball (Amazon Link)
Podcast Highlights
Please Note: This highlight is generated by a computer and may contain errors.
Introduction: Why We Resist What We Know Is Inevitable
Tim introduces a powerful but uncomfortable truth: resisting change is exhausting. We know change is constant — yet we fight it anyway.
Change rarely arrives clean or convenient. It shows up:
Uncomfortable at the start
Chaotic in the middle
Meaningful only in hindsight
Arguing with Reality
Tim shares how even small disruptions — a restaurant menu change, a friend moving away, a market shift — triggered frustration and resistance.
The deeper realization?
Arguing with reality consumes mental energy without changing outcomes.
“Reality doesn’t negotiate.”
A Mastermind Wake-Up Call
During a business mastermind session, a colleague asked a pivotal question:
Wasn’t a similar disruption the catalyst for launching a highly successful second division of the company?
That question reframed everything.
The same type of change that once created opportunity was now being treated as a threat.
The Neuroscience of Change
Research shows that uncertainty activates the amygdala — the brain’s threat detection center.
Even when change isn’t dangerous, it feels unsafe.
Tim references research from Harvard psychologist Ellen Langer, whose work demonstrates that people who approach change mindfully recover faster and extract more learning from disruption.
The event stays the same.
The mindset changes the outcome.
Hard at First. Messy in the Middle. Glorious at the End.
Tim reflects on a quote from The 5 AM Club by Robin Sharma:
“Change is hard at first, messy in the middle, and gorgeous at the end.”
He shares a deeply personal season marked by professional, personal, and physical challenges — a time where the lesson felt unreachable.
Growth didn’t come through motivation.
It came slowly — through coaching, support, reflection, and uncomfortable honesty.
And eventually, clarity emerged.
Two Anchoring Quotes
From Peter Senge:
“People don’t resist change. They resist being changed.”
From James Belasco and Ralph Stayer:
“Change is hard because people overestimate the value of what they have and underestimate the value of what they may gain.”
These insights reveal why we cling to familiarity — even when it no longer serves us.
Practical Reframe Questions
Instead of spiraling, Tim now asks:
What opportunity might exist here that I can’t see yet?
What is this change forcing me to rethink or release?
How might this serve my growth six months from now?
The shift doesn’t remove discomfort — it makes discomfort useful.
Closing Reflection
Change will continue.
That part is non-negotiable.
But how we meet it — that determines growth, resilience, and future opportunity.
“Hard at first. Messy in the middle. Glorious at the end.”
